Sunday, April 17, 2011

Wonderful Break with a tsp. of guilt!

Rainy days and SUNDAYS, perfect day for hanging out with my sweetie! Still recuperating from my Scottsdale stint of every day, three months straight. I have been filling my days with bits of painting, but still not able to completely immerse myself back into it again. This is not like a 9-5 job, well - not for me. Feast or famine! I go down to the studio in the mornings to muster as much discipline as I can and it is still just not quite there. The computer calls to me, my sister calls for coffee, my much-missed friends call to meet for lunch. I feel guilt, such guilt for not jumping back into my obligations the way I should. Distractions.....make them constructive ones.....drive four hours to a gallery to pick up work and come back....make portfolio CD's to send out.......get that website updated......does any of this sound familiar to anyone??? Maybe this is what they mean that an artist must fill ALL of their life in order to paint. Cooking - what sounds interesting tonight, what kind of playlist will help me get my mojo back? Maybe it's a full life experience that we fill ourselves with that makes us want to create. Maybe I'm making excuses. No maybe's about it. Could be that I'm missing the interaction with people every day. Could be the fear of jumping into a painting larger than I've ever done. Could be I just need more discipline to juggle the right brain and left brain. There is this idea knocking around in the back of my head...ooohhh, I am thinking of a great painting.....the muse is knocking at my door....I'll start again tomorrow!

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